did you get engaged???
I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Randomize
