Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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