is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
