I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Randomize
