I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Randomize
