He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
he high fived his dick after we had sex
Randomize
