found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
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