well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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