Grow some girl-balls and come out already
That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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