I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
you had me at cake vodka
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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