Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
We have so much sex to catch up on
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
Randomize
