East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
Randomize
