I feel great
I just peed on a car
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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