my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
