If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
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