Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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