please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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