remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
Randomize
