You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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