He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
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