can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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