Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
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