Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
Randomize
