In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
Randomize
