Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
vagina is talking i cant
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
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