I don't think brook has ever known best
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
