Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
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