yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize