Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize