let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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