dear santa what can i do with your candy cane?
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Randomize
