Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
Randomize
