their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
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