So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
Randomize
