I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
