walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Randomize
