So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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