listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
