But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
I just had sex on a roof
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
Randomize
