coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
