I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Randomize
