scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
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