u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
Randomize
