i permit you to call me
WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
Randomize
