All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Randomize
