I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize