I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize
