for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
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