Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
Randomize
