Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
I have already put on my inside pants.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize
