so explain again why im purple
no
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
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