hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
Randomize
